yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
