Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
