girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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