So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
