I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
