guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Enjoy the penises
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
