Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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