Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
