there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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