I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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