Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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