So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
