woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
