saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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