I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize