I just gift wrapped bread.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize