I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
