so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
