she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
