Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
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