I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
