is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
