i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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