Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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