My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
