no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
