Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
