bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
