saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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