i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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