Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
