you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
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