please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I'm always down for nudity.
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