dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
