Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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