does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
