I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
