erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
