He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize