so that wasnt chicken after all
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
