i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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