They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize