How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
