O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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