I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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