508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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