You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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