I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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