I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
do herpes really smell.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
