i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
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