I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize