Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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